THE AMERICAN CHEESEBURGER

Photo by Peter J. Cooper

There’s really only one way to judge a bistro, diner or private club restaurant – and that all comes down to how well they execute the classic American cheeseburger. It’s seemingly so simple and it’s been executed by restaurants for at least a century, yet so many chefs and cooks swing and miss by a mile, serving up bland, serviceable sandwiches without any real appreciation or passion for how good it could actually be and for such little effort. I love a great cheeseburger - so, to those who do it right, I raise my ice-cold American lager to salute you.

For starters, the one thing so many restaurants get wrong is the bun. And it’s not so much that they can’t pick a good bun, it’s mostly that they treat the bun as an afterthought. So, I’ll say this as plainly as possible: the bun and the beef patty are equally important. It’s like Mick Jagger and Keith Richards, or Steven Tyler and Joe Perry, or Michael Stipe and Peter Buck. To have a great band, you need a great front man and a great guitarist. The beef patty is always considered the front man, but the front man is nothing without the guitarist. You get it.

Freshly baked fluffy, buttery, golden brioche buns are essential. They are, without a doubt, at least a stand-up triple in this game. If you want a homerun, and this is of course a subjective opinion, go with brioche buns topped with sesame seeds. To maintain the baseball analogy, you’re not even really playing the game if you’re not serving brioche buns with or without sesame seeds made in-house, fresh every morning. I understand not every restaurant has room for ovens to bake bread, or even the revenue to afford the oven or a cook who doubles as a baker. If that’s the case, then get your buns from a local artisanal bakery that does the work for you every morning. Without a doubt, the burger restaurant down the street who is selling more burgers than you isn’t working harder, they’re just making better choices like freshly baked buns made earlier in the day. This is easy. It’s quite shocking how many restaurants are serving flat, lifeless buns delivered with frozen patties and bags of frozen French fries from a restaurant services company – and trying to pass them off as gourmet. Avoid restaurants like this at all costs. Life’s too short.

This next tip is essential if you want to forego freshly baked buns: avoid the cheap restaurant service companies’ buns no matter what. However, if you absolutely need to go with store-bought, then you have to go with Martin’s Famous Potato Rolls. There’s something about Martin’s that says you know what you’re doing when it comes to making the right choice. It’s like putting a knuckle ball pitcher into the game when you don’t have an ace. Your customers will understand and they’ll love it. But you better have a good beef patty to go with it. Martin’s buns are so good, you’ll have them stacked in their packaging above the shelves so your customers can see them. Trust me.

To continue with our mixed metaphors, time to talk about the lead singer in the band – the beef patty. There are so many different ways to make a burger, and each different way is what makes the burger proprietary to each restaurant. But there’s one thing the best burgers in every town have in common that is non-negotiable – your burger meat needs to be freshly ground in-house every day. It’s your choice whether you want ground chuck, brisket, round, short ribs, tri-tip, sirloin, wagyu beef or whatever. Some chefs like to blend two or even three cuts which may or may not include pork. From what I understand, the most common blend among chefs is an 80/20 mix of chuck and brisket. But the bottom line for a great burger is that it needs to be 20% fat. There’s nothing better than a juicy burger – and 20% fat is the kind of lead singer you want in your band. As for spices, that’s entirely up to you. Premium meat might just need a little salt and pepper or nothing at all; others like to add sauces, spices or even herbs. I’ve heard a rumor that a very popular American restaurant likes to add a pinch of sugar. A little advice as you serve your cheeseburgers – talk to your customers. Ask them for their opinions and ideas – you’ll know soon enough if you’re hitting a homerun or grounding out. It’s impressive how many chefs will watch their restaurant go under before ever thinking about getting customers’ opinions.

As for toppings, as long as they’re fresh then you’re doing fine. My recommendations are butter lettuce, nothing melts finer than American cheese (whatever it is), and if you don’t want to use American cheese, put on some white cheddar. Bread and butter pickles are always classic. You might want consider making your own - Matt Hranek has a simple pickle recipe in a back issue of Wm Brown magazine. Homemade mayonnaise if you can pull it off, or aioli sauce mixed with ketchup which is next-level goodness. Everyone loves bacon on a cheeseburger, but don’t underestimate what a freshly sliced avocado can do. A fried egg on top is other-worldly good. As for cooking the meat, again that goes entirely with the chef. But if you’re grilling, mesquite wood chips are a game-changer. Serve your cheeseburger on a large diner-style oval plate with hand-cut French fries and an ice-cold beer.

In Houston, some of the best cheeseburgers can be found at Hillstone Restaurant on Westpark at Kirby, with their 5.5 ounce freshly ground patties and their in-house baked sesame buns, Relish in River Oaks and Town and Country with their thick patties, fresh ingredients and golden brioche buns, and every day Mia’s Table grounds their brisket into burger patties and serves them on freshly baked brioche buns delivered early in the morning every day. Though I’m not a huge fan of smash burgers – State of Grace in River Oaks crushes it with their lunchtime pharmacy burger. And finally, if you really want to taste the best of the best, go to a premium steakhouse at lunch time and enjoy a cheeseburger made by a classically trained chef. Del Frisco’s Double Eagle Steakhouse is just about as good as it gets.  PJC